How To Tell Someone You Have Herpes
Its honestly NBD.
Truth: The majority of people likely have some form of herpes . An estimated 67 percent of people worldwide under the age of 50 are carrying the oral strain , and 11 percent carry the genital strain , according to the World Health Organization.
Further, an estimated 90 percent of people have been exposed to the virus by age 50. Oh yeah, and the numbers are probably higher than that, since herpes isnt included on a routine STI panel, and many symptomless people go undiagnosed.
Yet despite the viruss prevalence, the stigma surrounding herpes is realand that can make telling a new partner about your status difficult, intimidating, and awkward AF.
But if you are diagnosed, do not panic, says Sarah Watson, a licensed professional counselor and certified sex therapist. Herpes is not a death sentence for your sex life, but you do need to let your partners know, just as you would need to tell them if you had any other STD. Heres how to tell your S.O. that you have herpes, as comfortably and painlessly as possible.
Im Pregnant How Could Genital Herpes Affect My Baby
If you are pregnant and have genital herpes, prenatal care visits are very important. Some research suggest that a genital herpes infection may lead to miscarriage or make it more likely to deliver your baby too early. You can pass herpes to your unborn child before birth, but it more commonly passes during delivery. This can lead to a deadly infection in your baby . It is important that you avoid getting genital herpes during pregnancy. Tell your healthcare provider if you have ever had a genital herpes diagnosis or symptoms. Also tell them about any possible exposure to genital herpes.
If you have genital herpes, you may need to take anti-herpes medicine towards the end of your pregnancy. This medicine may reduce your risk of having signs or symptoms of genital herpes when you deliver. At the time of delivery, your healthcare provider should carefully examine you for herpes sores. If you have signs or symptoms of genital herpes at delivery, a C-section is likely to occur.
How Soon Do Symptoms Appear
Symptoms tend to come on suddenly anywhere from two days to two weeks after youve been exposed to the virus.
The appearance of symptoms is called an outbreak. After your initial outbreak is treated, you may have subsequent outbreaks during the next year and occasionally throughout the rest of your life.
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How Can Genital Herpes Be Prevented
There is not yet a vaccine to protect against the herpes virus. There are a number of things to consider which may reduce your risks of getting genital herpes or of passing it on to others. These include:
- Consider the use of condoms always, even in settled relationships. This is because a person can carry the herpes virus for a very long time and pass it on without ever being aware of it. Condoms do not completely protect against herpes but they reduce the risk.
- The more sexual partners you have, the more the risk of picking up any STI, including herpes. So avoiding having too many partners will cut down your risk.
- Avoid having sex with somebody with an active genital herpes infection .
- Also avoid intimate contact with a person who has a cold sore.
- If you have an active herpes infection yourself, avoid having sex with anyone else in order to prevent passing it on.
- If one partner finds out they have herpes, it is wise to tell the other. This can reduce transmission rates.
- If a person knows they have recurrent herpes, taking a regular antiviral medicine can reduce the risk of passing on the virus.
- In particular, a pregnant woman should avoid having sex with somebody with active herpes, because of the extra risk to the baby during delivery.
Is There Any Resistance To Genital Herpes Medication
Resistance to drugs that treat genital herpes even after 20 years of use is very rare. Herpes medications may not work as well in patients who are very immunosuppressed and have been treated with these drugs for a long time. Each individuals response to treatment may vary. In some cases, patients may need more drugs to suppress their viral outbreaks than others.
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What Does Genital Herpes Look Like
While some people with genital herpes will never have any symptoms, other people can develop symptoms within a few weeks of being infected.
Often, before the lesions appear, patients describe a prodrome, characterized by a tingling or burning sensation in the area where the lesions will develop that can be noticed during urination, along with itching or discomfort in the genital area.
You can also have the following symptoms:
- Blisters on the mouth or lips
- Fever, headache or pain in the joints
- Trouble urinating
The symptoms of genital herpes often go away and come back as recurring outbreaks. For most people, the first outbreak is the worst, and can last from two to three weeks. Future flare-ups are often less severe and do not last as long. Still, some people shed the virus regularly. The following triggers can make outbreaks more likely to occur:
- Viral or bacterial infections
- Menstrual periods
Recurrent genital herpes is most common in the first year after the initial infection and decreases as time goes on.
In many cases, anti-herpes medicine can help patients. When a person experiences a prodrome and suspects a recurrence is going to happen, they begin taking anti-herpes medications that lessen symptoms and shorten the time of the outbreak.
General Measures That May Help To Ease Symptoms When They Occur
- Painkillers such as paracetamol may help to ease pain.
- If it is painful when you pass urine, it is often less painful if you pass urine whilst sitting in a warm bath or with water flowing over the area.
- A numbing ointment that you can buy at pharmacies, called lidocaine 5% gel, may relieve itching or pain. Some people also apply ointment about five minutes before passing urine if this is painful. Note: some people are sensitive to anaesthetic ointments, and the ointment then makes skin symptoms worse. Applying Vaseline® before passing urine may be a helpful alternative to anaesthetic ointment.
- Ice wrapped in a tea towel placed over the sores for 5-10 minutes may be soothing. Do not put ice directly on to skin, as this may cause an ice burn.
- Have plenty to drink. This can help to make your urine less strong and less concentrated. This may make passing urine less painful.
- Do not use scented soaps, bubble bath, etc, as these may irritate. Gentle cleaning of the sores with just cotton wool and plain or salt water is best. Gentle drying with a hairdryer on its lowest setting may be more comfortable than with a towel.
- When you resume sexual activity after an episode has cleared, a lubricant may help, as some people find the friction of having sex may trigger a recurrence.
Other points:
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How Do You Know If You Have Herpes
Herpes, a viral and highly contagious disease, it can present itself in a number of ways. But how do you know if you have herpes? There are many things that you need to look for to see if you have it.
First, you can see the signs make themselves apparent on your skin. Oral herpes is usually present on your lip and you will find it there on the top or bottom of your lips. It will begin to grow slowly, and start off as a sort of reddish rash lesion. Then it will develop into a larger infection that will begin to crack, peel, and you will see a lot of inflammation around the lesion area, it could be very painful.
It might even take on a greenish tint and will be very uncomfortable. But how do you know if you have herpes when this sort of sore comes up on your mouth? If all these symptoms are accompanied with pain and fevers, then you can pretty much be certain that that is what it is.
Sometimes herpes can affect your fingers or thumbs, or even on your toes. In this case, how do you know if you have herpes when your finger or toes begin to hurt? Check your cuticles, if you see a spreading, greenish blister, then chances is you have herpes and need to seek treatment.
Herpes on your eyes can be a very dangerous kind and needs immediate attention. If your eye starts to swell and your eyelids also become swollen and you begin to see itchy white bumps around your cornea, you certainly have it and need to get it checked fast.
How To Recognize Herpes
This article was medically reviewed by Lacy Windham, MD. Dr. Windham is a board certified Obstetrician & Gynecologist in Tennessee. She attended medical school at the University of Tennessee Health Science Center in Memphis and completed her residency at the Eastern Virginia Medical School in 2010, where she was awarded the Most Outstanding Resident in Maternal Fetal Medicine, Most Outstanding Resident in Oncology, and Most Outstanding Resident Overall.There are 16 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. This article has been viewed 590,219 times.
Herpes is caused by the herpes simplex virus. It has two variations, the HSV-1 and HSV-2. HSV-1 usually manifests as a cold sore, or oral lesion, but may sometimes appear on the genitals. HSV-2 refers to genital herpes. HSV-2 is the most common viral sexually transmitted infection in the US and causes infections of the skin and mucous membranes, rectum, eyes, and central nervous system. Herpes is a lifelong and incurable STI.XResearch sourceA Wald, Genital HSV-1 Infections, Sexually Transmitted Infections, 2005 June, 82, 189-190 If you think you may have the virus, follow a few simple steps to recognize if you have herpes.
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What You Need To Know
- Herpes simplex virus , also known as genital herpes, is most likely to be spread when an infected person is having an outbreak, but it can also be transmitted without any symptoms being present.
- Medications can help reduce your symptoms, speed up the healing of an outbreak and make you less contagious.
- If you know you have genital herpes before becoming pregnant, your physician will monitor your condition throughout your pregnancy. If you have an active outbreak at the time of delivery, cesarean section may be recommended.
More Questions From Patients:
Many people with genital herpes have no symptoms, or have very mild symptoms that go unnoticed.
The first time genital herpes symptoms appear is called the “first episode” or “initial herpes.” Initial herpes symptoms are usually more noticeable than later outbreaks.
Symptoms of genital herpes in men may include
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burning when you pee if you have sores
-
trouble peeing if you have sores covering your urethra
-
itching or pain around your genitals
During initial herpes, symptoms may also include
-
swollen, tender glands in the pelvic area, throat, or under the arms
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Which Std Tests Should I Get
If you are sexually active, getting tested for STDs is one of the most important things you can do to protect your health. Make sure you have an open and honest conversation about your sexual history and STD testing with your doctor and ask whether you should be tested for STDs. If you are not comfortable talking with your regular health care provider about STDs, there are many clinics that provide confidential and free or low-cost testing.
Below is a brief overview of STD testing recommendations. STD screening information for healthcare providers can be found here.
You can quickly find a place to be tested for STDs by entering your zip code in the form below.
Find an STD testing site near you.
How Long Does It Take For Symptoms Of Herpes To Appear
It generally takes anywhere from 4 to 7 days for herpes symptoms to appear. Both genital and oral herpes outbreaks have similar symptoms.
The primary symptom of a herpes outbreak is sores that resemble blisters, called herpes lesions, on the mouth or genitals.
In addition, people may also experience the following symptoms prior to the outbreak:
- pain and redness, especially around the area the outbreak will occur
- itching and tingling, primarily in the outbreak area
- flu-like symptoms, such as fatigue, fever, or swollen lymph nodes
Most of the symptoms that occur before an outbreak indicate that the virus is replicating. Symptoms are usually the worst during the first herpes outbreak.
According to the
Some people with the herpes virus are asymptomatic, which means that they dont experience any physical symptoms of the disease. This doesnt mean that they cant spread the disease, however.
Anyone who has the herpes virus, whether symptomatic or not, can spread the virus to others.
If you have the herpes virus and your body has produced antibodies, it can be detected on a blood test, even if you have no symptoms. The only time the virus might not be detected on a test is if youve been tested too early.
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What About Chlamydia The Most Common Std
Chlamydia is caused by bacteria, whereas herpes is caused by a virus. This is why chlamydia is easily treated and cured with antibiotics. However, many people have chlamydia and dont know it because they don’t have any symptoms. That’s why people who are at higher risk of chlamydia, including sexually active young women and men who have sex with other men, are advised to get a test for chlamydia every year.
If you don’t treat chlamydia, it can increase the chances of both men and women getting or giving HIV and AIDS, according to Medline Plus. Untreated chlamydia can also cause serious pelvic inflammatory disease in women, which can lead to infertility, and in men it can spread to the testicles and the tube that carries sperm, causing inflammation.
Screening for chlamydia is usually done by taking a urine sample or a swab from your genitals. Results of these tests are usually found quickly. Different testing methods are used for infections of the rectum and throat, and these take more time.
While the only way to completely avoid getting chlamydia or herpes is to not have sex, you can reduce your chances of getting both by being in a long-term, mutually monogamous relationship with a partner who is not infected with an STD and by using latex condoms every time you have sex.
How Can You Prevent Cold Sores
To avoid being infected with HSV-1, you should take the following precautions around people who have cold sores:
- Avoid kissing, intimate contact and oral sex with someone who has a cold sore.
- Dont share towels, razors, dishes, cutlery, straws, lip balm or lipstick.
- Wash your hands before touching your lips, eyes or genitals.
If youve already come into contact with HSV-1, do these to reduce risk of a cold sore outbreak:
- Try to stay healthy: A fever can trigger a cold sore, which is why people sometimes call them fever blisters.
- Get enough rest: Fatigue weakens your immune system and makes you more likely to get sick.
-
Wear lip balm with SPF: Protecting your lips from sunburn can help you avoid an outbreak.
If you have a cold sore, be careful around babies. Always wash your hands, and do not kiss a baby until the cold sore has healed completely.
The following may reduce the risk of spreading the herpes simplex virus:
Oral herpes If you have sores on your face:
- Do not kiss anyone.
- Do not have oral sex.
- Do not share items such as silverware, cups, towels, and lip balms.
If you have tingling, burning, itching, or tenderness where you had a herpes sore, keep that area of your body away from others.
You can prevent spreading the sores to other parts of your body by:
- Washing your hands after touching a cold sore.
- Using a cotton-tip swab to apply herpes medicine to a cold sore also helps.
Genital herpes When you have sores or symptoms do not have sex with uninfected partners.
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Recognizing The Signs: The Prodrome
Early in the phase of reactivation , many people experience an itching, tingling, or painful feeling in the area where their recurrent lesions will develop. This sort of warning symptomcalled a prodromeoften comes a day or two before lesions appear. To be on the safe side, its best to assume virus is active during these times.
What Is Neonatal Herpes
Neonatal herpes can be a very serious infection. Babies generally contract the virus from their birthing parent during childbirth even if the parent doesnt have active lesions. They may also get HSV-1 if an adult with an active cold sore kisses them. Breastfeeding babies can also get HSV-1 from the breast if there are lesions present. But babies cant get herpes from breast milk, so its safe to pump and feed.
Herpes simplex can be more dangerous for young babies because they dont have a fully developed immune system. But most babies with neonatal herpes can recover fully with treatment.
The dangers of neonatal herpes are much higher if the infection spreads to the babys organs. If youre pregnant and have herpes, speak with your healthcare provider about how to lower the risk of passing the infection to your baby.
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